Zombies Would Be Preferable

Uh oh.

You guys.

Why...WHY...do I click on articles like this?

Now, in addition to the typical worries that keep me awake at 4 am (thank you, perimenopause), I can add to the list a solar storm.

Evidently, a large solar storm could knock out the power grid. For months or longer. For a large portion of the country. And there's a 12% chance of it happening in the next ten years? What?

This is the kind of news that makes me wish that I was a Doomsday Prepper. You know—the kind of person who is stocking a year's supply of food and water, plus the arsenal of weaponry I would need to defend it.

So I've decided to take stock of my current supply situation.

• Water. Um, there's a pond on the golf course by my house. Can water filters remove fertilizer run off, does anyone know?
• Food. Let's hope I would've just gone to Costco. Of course, if it were summer, we could count on our community garden plot...to supply us with basil and tomatoes for a week or more! But how do I make pesto without a blender?
• Fuel. Yeah. I can just see my husband felling one of our 90-year-old oak trees. 
• Candles. I own two scented candles plus a bag of pine-scented votives. Really gonna smell good in here. 

To defend my stash, I plan to use my father's old navy sword. Never mind that it couldn't cut a stick of butter. I will hone it. On the curb out front.

I'm going out shopping now to start my preparations. First stop: the one item that is obviously first on the list for any emergency.

What? It's for medicinal purposes.